& Now I Know Them.

Sometimes it's hard to write down how I feel because my emotions change so frequently. I know that how I feel right now may be the polar opposite within the hour. From the time my day starts at seven every morning, until I close my eyes around ten at night, I've experienced so many emotions that I wonder if I could ever sleep enough to ride myself of exhaustion. What choice do I have but to get up and do it all over again? Better yet, would I even choose anything else? Naww.

I down a cup of chai and then I'm off to catch a tuk-tuk. If I wasn't already awake I soon will be from the completely unnecessary, ever persistent, honking on the pot-hole ridden roads to school. SSN school is an informal building tucked away down a dirt path just outside Jaipur. The students swarm through the gate, eager to spend the next three hours copying down vocabulary words, which are accompanied by my lovely drawings of course. My airplane probably wouldn't stay in flight for long and my camel could easily be mistaken for a longneck dinosaur with a hunchback. But, nevertheless they are happy to copy anything we place on the board. We have to be extremely careful not to mention C-O-L-O-R, because a frenzy will undoubtedly break out. I'm often screamed at in Hindi for not having the appropriate shade of green or purple their little hearts desire. I feel for them though, growing up with Crayola's macaroni orange and azul blue. We do our very best to satisfy them with what we have though. They're grateful for all the attention we have to offer, and many of them truly are intelligent. Which is exactly what breaks my heart.

I was so fortunate, and often took for granted my education in the States. I had teachers who fluently spoke my language, I had at least one text book for every subject, and all the crayons and colored pencils I would ever need. I was often challenged and encouraged to perform well, even when I neglected to present my very best effort. I was often lazy and mindless toward my assignments. However, I was still able to thrive and prosper in my environment because of the value placed on education from both my parents. I was spoiled really, and extremely lucky. I was always taught that school was a privilege denied to many; formal, structured education that is. But until now I hadn't known personally who those "many" were. 

Insert Tangent Here.

Two days of teaching and I've already realized that education is much more of a complex issue than I had originally assumed. Development being my main focus as a TBB student, I have already concluded that education is in fact the driving force of development. However, in addition to this focus I have made it a personal goal of mine to "think beyond the borders" of the western world. The idea of development from the standpoint of an American is so simple. Give poverty stricken countries aid and they will eventually get their shit together. Send volunteers into rural villages to "better the community" and one by one we Americans can change the world. From a recliner back in the States, this issue with development is quite simple.

Think again.

Aid can very easily create dependence, in turn ultimately preventing sustainability. Going into any project or program with the intention of "helping"---because we Westerners obviously know how to do everything right---will be detrimental to one or more parties involved. Growing up in America I had always had the common aspiration of changing the world. You must know that I was by no means naive about the entirety of global issues. I had seen poverty on large scale, I had seen injustice, I had witnessed oppression, and I had felt guilt, sympathy, and depression because of these worldly experiences. Although, I realize now how under qualified I was, and still am, to change the world.

I am a little over two months into a seven month program revolving around development. I have only been immersed in two of the four issues we will be studying. (Correct me if I am wrong, Robin.) Our structure of curriculum is designed with the intention to understand that these four issues -public health, education, sustainable agriculture, and natural resources- all funnel into development. I have already perceived that there are so many small issues that at length do effect the realm of development. It is utterly mind-blowing to attempt at understanding, much less act upon, how I could ever actually come to change the world. Nevertheless, even during all this daunting frustration, I know I am at the very least gaining knowledge. Knowledge I would most certainly not possess had I not taken this gap year with TBB. I am eternally grateful to have been able to seise the opportunity to think about the world beyond the Western borders. 

Contrary To My Speculation, Culture Shock Is Real.

Jaipur was supposedly painted pink by a king to impress his guest of honor some time ago. Quite frankly, I don't recall all the details, I was rather fatigued on the bus ride after traveling for a solid twenty four hours. However, after being here for almost a week, I realize that this "said king" was clearly color blind. The buildings are definitely more a shade of peach, rather than pink. But that is mainly "the old city", where we did quite a bit of cite seeing. Playing tourist has its perks but catching a tuk-tuk with my two roommates has most certainly been my cultural highlight thus far.

"So, when we see an empty one do we just wave like hell??"
Emily's approach seemed to be sufficiently effective because in no time at all we were bouncing along in the backseat of the little three-wheeled contraption. To say the streets of Jaipur are bustling would be an understatement. I've come to a fairly certain conclusion that there is no safe form of transit here, so I suppose the tuk-tuk will have to suffice. It's quite energizing to have your life flash before your eyes a few times a day anyhow.

Shockingly, even to myself, I am already becoming adjusted to Indian life. Most of my fear had been of the mass amounts of curry I was sure to be consuming. However, I have found the food to be extremely appetizing. It's a good thing I don't miss hamburgers all that much though, because there are more of them walking the streets than on the dinner tables. Which in a strange way makes me feel at home.

I find myself torn between anxiety and excitement about starting work here. Come to find out, I will literally be teaching English in a small village school. I guess a high school diploma is credit enough to be an Indian teacher.

All in all I'm finding city life in Jaipur absolutely fabulous...



Stay tuned for more thrilling tales from the wonderful world of TBB.